i was expecting more of college......
practically.... my life now is.....
class..... makan...... library(of all places??)...... class... go back..... come back the nxt day doing the same routine......
My life now is SO SO SO ROUTINE..... the normal life which i wanted last time but learn despise now..... i enjoyed my life last time... everyday was..... UNPREDICTABLE! (for those whom r close to u, u shud know this story)
yes.. i noe college should be more than that.... but how to make it more than juz that???? there r so few english speaking around me.....
then again.... its gud rite??? if this goes on, seriously.... my grades can go up! cuz mainly my life serves no other purpose but to study..... N thats the main reason to go college rite..... (screw the holistic education thing.... my mum juz wants me to graduate from there n start looking for a job) plus... i already paid the RM3.5k....
If i go for form 6, it'll be more of a gamble.... i may do well.... i may not do well.... depends on my STPM results n wat the local U's offer me...... N wat happens after that??? wat if they start offering me courses like Perikanan or Kemanusiaan.....? i'll become a fisherman???
the road not taken...... now i reali feel it..... or izzit juz me askin too much....? hah... mayb la..... i'll juz shut up n face up to it..... somehow... a decision has to be made... n a decision that can only be made by me................................................................ shyt!
Head filled with thoughts but not willing to make any decision juz yet..... thats juz the indecisive marcus lim that i am....... i'm beginning to feel miserable.... n from the way i look at it now... i wouldn't be happy with either choice i make.....cuz i will think more of the cons of my current choice n pro's of the other choice n also wat i "should" have done.....
or mayb i should actually accept the star edu fund n go KL................................................. wat the hell m i thinking......"mind! do not play tricks with me....."
"scared wat..... most oso i screw up my life oni maaa......"
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