the marcusly thing to do....

i cant believe that i'm actually gonna do it.... But i still am gonna do it.... i'm turning down the very opportunity of my life!!!!!

I'm gonna decline the Star scholarship....
yes, i already got the "U MAD ah????" kind of reply....

now that i reali look at it.... i'm gonna waste even more money by taking up the scholarship....
the course is worth RM24k.... which will be funded by the Star scholarship....
but how about the cost of living there??? it will definitely come up to about RM1k per month.... 3 years n RM36k gone juz like that.... then how about other unmentioned fees??

Student Insurance (Per Annum)

• Local Student : RM 60
• International Student : RM 250

Caution Deposit (Refundable) : RM 200
Library Fee (Per Semester) : RM 60
Computer Lab Fee (Per Semester) : RM 60
Engineering Lab Fee (Per Semester) : RM 100
Internal Examination Fee (Per Subject) : RM 60

and, of course, the misery of a marcuslim cannot end so simple.... RIMA college oni offers a diploma... n not even a degree... so how can i continue on??? AH, yes, they have partners... i will have a guaranteed seat at the University of Glasgow, Scotland, for my degree n even masters the minute i get my diploma from RIMA... An engineer from Scotland is considered to be the 1st class engineers.... and to make it sweeter, its the no.3 top universities for engineering.... sound so good to be true rite??? wait till u c the cost...... there r so many zero's that i even forgot how many.... n guess wat? its in pounds, meaning X7 of the amount for us Malaysians....

"But wat if i was on a scholarship there??? wouldn't that be juz fantastic??" that is wat my hopeful, naive mind wound tell my logical side....

Interviewer there(as if reading my mind) then said "nope, Star is NOT gonna sponsor u all the way to Scotland... it will oni take u until ur diploma..."

After that, not only will i be stuck wif juz a diploma.... i have to come back to penang and do my degree at INTI or smth... then wats the whole point??? there is no point....

the nxt thing that strike my mind is simply...... "Then there is nothing left to chase after...."

i might as well juz spend within my means n go have my entire course in INTI....i can save like (RM36k-RM19k=RM17k) for my diploma and save a year in my degree...

so now.... in this desperate moment of my life.... only one person this whole wide world whom i can seek help from now....

I'm going for it!! I shall find the answer!!! I shall depart to the wise sage that lives juz down the road from my house....

"Miss Leeeeeeeee! help...." (fyi: not lee ewe im..... i'll oni c her if i want things to go worse...)

All of the sudden....

I got a reply from Star Education Fund...(I should be very happy.....)
They shortlisted me for interview............(i should be glad.....)
They offered me out of Penang.................( smth i always wanted.....)
But....
Now that i look at it..... it doesn't feel rite....
They offered a Diploma course in RIMA college which is in kl..... have ANYONE ever heard of it??? Surely malay dominated....
so how?? still go for it??

one part of my mind is saying... "A schlolarship is still a scholarship n of course ppl should be happy to receive it... I shall do my best and make it right thru!!!"

the other part will say... " if i were to calculate properly, assuming the cost of living here is negligible, the cost of living there will be more than doing my whole Diploma course here..... n its not the fees of the Diploma that will kill me but the fees of the Degree.... so the scholarship actually doesnt reali play a big role.... if they extend the scholarship to degree means no prob d la... but will they ever do that???

Estimated cost of living in KL for a marcuslim : RM1,000 per month
so.... RM1,000 x 12(months) x 3(years)
=RM36,000
(thats almost double of the cost of a Diploma in INTI which is RM19k oni)

.....BUT!!!

If the scholarship continues on.... i will oni need pay for the cost of living then...
RM36,000 + RM24,000(for2 more years)
=RM60,000 ...........................which is exactly enuf from the budget my mum gave me...RM60k

If the scholarship DOES NOT continue.... i need pay for the cost of livin and also the fees of the Degree ON MY OWN which is even MORE!!!(estimated RM50k for a degree)
meaning RM60,000+RM50,000=RM110,000........... which is ABSOLUTELY NOT affordable for my family... (double my family's budget on me tertiary edu)

By then the onli thing left to do when that a rises is come back here n continue my degree here in Penang.... at the end of the day.... wats all my struggle there for??? juz so i can waste my parents money and waste another year in Inti (if take diploma in inti, we get a jump start n automatically be on 2nd year d....) BOTH TIME N MONEY WASTED!!! even worst!!


N so i'm the indecisive Marcuslim again... juz when i decided on going to inti d.... this HAS to happen.... the interview is on 24th of April so when will i get the results..? probably a couple of weeks later.... then how about my INTI??? INTI punya intake is at 5th of May... means i have to register there be4 that date.... so wat do i do???

Option no. 1
wait for the reply form RIMA n dun go INTI...

Option no.2
go register at INTI n pay like RM3k for the 1st semester and then go for the RIMA thing if i'm called...

Option no.3
juz continue my plan in INTI n forget about the RIMA thing...


SHIT.... i hate decision makings..... izzit juz me or do i juz think too much...

I'm.... I'm..... I'm fine....

So freaking weird!!!!!!!!!!!!
when someone ask me how was i these few days....
"i'm fine, thank u."(wat i would say regardless if i'm reali ok or not)
"yea... actually.... I AM FINE!!!!"

its juz so weird!!!
i didn't break anything
i didn't fall
i didn't get into trouble
i didn't mess things up
i didn't had weird foolish stupendous dreams
i didn't get any injury
.
.
.
.
.
(recently)

i'm totally fine..... everthing is going fine...
i dunno wat to say.... i'm NORMAL!!!! WOW!!!

TAG!!

Instructions: Remove 1 question from below, and add in your personal question, make it a total of 20 questions, then tag 8 people in your list, list them out at the end of this post. Notify them in their chat box that he/she has been tagged. Whoever does the tag will have blessings from all.

1. What are you craving now?
star fruit blended wif ice…. Aaahh… I dun even eat star fruits.. but I somehow have a craving for it… somehow…

2. What was the last movie you've watched?
L Change The World. Wif wei loon n chiang… My life is more interesting than it…

3. If you were to be stranded on a desert island, who are the 3 blog buddies you would take with you?
Eiven- to knock some sense into me
Wei Loon- to wack me when I need to be awake
The semangat, all-fired up, everything-oso-can Marcus lim(who else? I only have 2 frens…)

4. What are you most happy with now?
SparkiE!!! My motorbike!!!

5. If you can have 1 dream to come true, what would it be?I have too many weird dreams… weird weird dreams… seriously… refer to wei loon or eiven or wen ping for more details…
Dream 9876:
When I save π(pye) from R`2(radius squared).. damn cool… attaining squirrel claws..LOL

6. Do you listen to music to relax?
Opposite! I listen to music to get hype up when no semangat….

7. What are you afraid to lose the most now?
My sanity, my imagination…. N my hair… I’m loosin hair…

8. Why are you wasting your time to do this?
wasting time is juz wat I do… so wat if I wanna have some fun while wastin it….

9. If you meet someone that you love, would you confess to him/her?
How would i know… haven’t tried… I would try, I guess…(probably fail be4 trying but I’ll try)

10. List out 3 good points of the person who tagged you.Wei Loon
-insane (that’s the no.1 thing that struck my mind)
-trusty (I call tell him about almost anything…)
-fleshy n strong (wat I always wanted)

11. What are the requirements that you wish from your other half?Trustworthy n a nice sincere smile… I couldn’t ask for more…

12. Which type of person do you hate the most?
Ppl who juz think themselves so high n mighty n better than everyone else….

13. What is your ambition?
To be a normal person… wif a normal family….in a normal live…

14. If you have fault, would you rather the people around you point out to you or would you rather they keep quiet?
I get soooo many of those points that its so much easier that I take the blame for everything… even if its not my own doing…

15. What do you think is the most important thing in your life?
My life!

16. If given a choice, what animal would you be and why?
DEFINITELY NOT A SQUIRREL!!! Sloth- eat, sleep, shit n hang around all day

17. Find a word to describe the person who tagged you
INSANE

18. What will you do when someone faints in front of you?
First Aider mode!!!!
1st I shall access the situation, then I will look for danger, if any, I’ll remove the dangers from the casualty. If the danger cannot be moved, I will remove the casualty from the danger as a last resort.
I will then check for the casulty’s consciousness/respond by using “shake n shout” method. “brother, brother, can u hear me”(while shakin his shoulders)
IF STILL UNCONSCIOUS, next I will check for the casualty’s breathing using the “look, listen n feel” method. I will look for the rising of the chest, listen to the sound of breathing and feel the breath on my cheek for 10 secs(1,2,3….10!)
IF NOT BREATHING,I will then check for the casualty’s pulse by placin my index finger n middle finger on the casualty’s adam’s apple and slide it to the gaps between the muscles and feel for the carotid pulse for 10 secs.(1,2,3…10!)
IF NO PULSE? Kick d fella n say I tried my best… I ain’t commencing wif CPR… (if it’s a nice cun girl then I might reconsider…)

19. What makes you different?
I… I…I don’t know… I’m juz different… u’ll know once know me

20. How many times have you lied so far?
How big is the Universe?(face it… it’s the best answer)


“TAG” to my dear 2 blogger frens whom already been tagged…
Eiven, wei loon

Inti or Disted??? Lemon tea or mustard??

DECISIONS DECISIONS DECISIONS.....
Which to choose...What to choose? its much easier to c ppl make decision than to reali do it urself.... How much courage needed to even make up ur mind... Tough... But if smth has to be done then smth HAS TO BE DONE... NEVER EVER regret on things that u could have done but didnt... I should have thought about my tertiary education a long time ago but i choose to procrastinate till now.... my bad actually... but the decision has to be made... As i would normally say to myself,"Be a man! Make the right decision"(quoted from Eiven actually)... Wat IS the right decision actually?? wat IS the best pathway?? i guess the only way to find out is by going through it...

WAIT!!!

the decision is still not made?? INTI or Disted???
(might actually be useless askin it here but i juz had to do smth...)
nobody likes making decisions... Even god... i think....(faster hide under the bed in case of lightning strike...)

Arcades.... its juz not the same...

recently that day i went to the arcade... went twice... one wif a leavin fren of mine, Wei Loon n his good buddy.... Chiang!(i'm bad wif chinese names.... previously i tot it was xiang)... it was a typical trip to the arcade... we played and challenged each other like most ppl would do, or so i thought....
A few days later, went wif my old skbg frens... we played stupid games as usual but it turned out different!!! Y?? this time got more ppl and we play for the sake of playin n not for the sake of winning... n oso the screamin girls....seems more fun wif them... N wait 1 moment... i didnt even win much when i actually want to win... I win more when havin fun.... weird? marcusly...

nothing bad has happened... yet.... thankfully....(touch wooood....)

The begining of my story

hi... this is the 1st ever time i'm blogging n i dun quite expect anyone to read.... but if anyone did then... gud for u... there r tons of things that i would reali like to share but, frankly, i'm so very lazy to type... its much easier tell someone than to type it all down... i rather waste my time doing smth else... but i have a new vision... i SHALL START typing down my experiences... this way i can remember them for life... rather than relying on the unreliable sources like Wei Loon to remind me..(but its actually useful at times...thanks ya)

to sum everything up.... I will forget about the past and start anew here... watever i encounter nxt will be written here....

N i have a strong intuition of bad luck n misforetune which is never wrong coming my way... so it wont be long till smth happens to me n me writing here wat happened...